Several years ago I flew to and from a trade show via TF Green Airport in Providence, RI instead of Boston Logan Airport as usual. This small airport has (or at least had at the time) one large economy parking lot with shuttle buses.
Remember Ralph Kramden? The bus driver I dealt with was the Anti-Kramden.
You were supposed to give the bus driver the number of your bus stop near your car. Running late, I rushed to catch my departing flight and didn’t make note of the number, but I knew I had parked near a certain corner of the lot.
“Excuse me,” I said to the bus driver, “but I don’t have my bus stop number. Can you just drop me off at whatever stop is nearest to the far right corner of the lot?”
“What’s the number?” grunted the bus driver.
“I don’t have the number. But I know my car is near the far right corner of the lot from where we are right now.”
“What’s the number?” the driver again grunted, a little louder this time.
(What…?!) “I said I don’t have the number. I’m near that corner of the lot over to your right.”
“What’s the number?”
(Is this guy for real?!) “Look, can you just stop anywhere near the far corner of the lot?”
One of my colleagues from the trade show, a TF Green regular and just as annoyed with the driver as I was, shouted out a stop number he happened to know was close to my car. The bus driver, now given “The Number,” did silently agree to stop there, his eyes forward as I walked off the bus. Note that there was no language, cultural or hearing-ability issue with the driver. He was simply locked into his own way of thinking to a ridiculous degree: no stop number, no stop.
The way a person communicates is a major component of their reputation and personal brand. And I believe the vast majority of communication problems are caused by the personal baggage we bring to the table when communicating, known in psychological terms as confirmation bias. Continue reading